Over the last week or so, a couple of things have happened to me that have made me really appreciate the way God thinks about me.

I think we all (to different degrees) have a tendency to form opinions of each other by our perceived actions.  However much we try to extend the grace of God and to love each other unconditionally, that thought, or niggle, might never completely go away.  For some people it’s just that, a thought they push to the back of their minds because it’s unhelpful; for others it becomes an issue they have with that individual that gets in the way of a productive relationship.

I’ve had two really good examples of this lately.  One is a work related situation and one outside work.  In both cases people have held tings against me – one without even telling me, and the other so determined that their view of things must be right, they didn’t care what the consequences were and we couldn’t finish a piece of work we both wanted to do.  On these two occasions, both sets of behaviour were completely out of the blue and I had done absolutely nothing wrong – their perception is completely inaccurate (and they probably know it). 

Now I’m not just saying that.  I do get things wrong.  I get quite a few things wrong.  But on these occasions, I know without a shadow of a doubt their complaints are completely unfounded and unjust.  Both I believe are motivated by anger /blame displacement – trying to shift something from themselves to me. 

On top of that, I had a parking violation warning.  Try as I might I cannot work out what parking rules I violated.  I was in the correct bay, within the correct time, and there were no instructions for me to follow unless I was to park for more than 90 minutes, which I didn’t.  I couldn’t find anyone to ask and there were no contact details on the note for me to follow it up, so I had to swallow my pride, chalk it up to experience, and thank God it was a warning and not a fine.

I’m the sort of person who is bothered by what people think of me.  I know I shouldn’t be, but I am.  I think we all are to a certain extent.  ‘Earthly’ me would be really bothered by these events, and if I’m honest, I have lost sleep and my worry lines have deepened.

But the wonderful thing is that God doesn’t form his opinion of me by what I do, or what he thinks I might have done (or not done), or take things out on me because he’s angry with himself.  God knows exactly what has happened, when I’ve made mistakes, and when I haven’t.  God isn’t unpredictable – he loves me unconditionally and his opinion doesn’t change with his mood.

Whilst I work at extending grace and trying to see these people through God’s eyes, I know that they are doing nothing of the sort, and probably cursing me for something they have no right accusing me of.  But because I know that God loves me whatever I do, I don’t need to worry about what they think.  I can talk to the Holy Spirit about what God thinks of me, remain secure in him and get some decent sleep!

Let’s not forget, Jesus was subject to humiliation, abuse, torture and death for our mistakes.  He’d done nothing wrong, yet he gracefully accepted the blame and paid the price.  His belief in who he was wasn’t shaken, he didn’t spiral in depression thinking it was so unfair that the world was out to get him… even though he wasn’t particularly looking forward to what was to come.  So who am I to let these couple of things affect who I am?  Through everything that happened, Jesus was secure in who he was and what his purpose was.  A few people thinking nasty things about me – whether fairly or not – hardly compares.  The amazing truth is that God loves me whatever I do, and he forgives and gets past my mistakes.

I am a hand-picked, unconditionally loved child of God.  I have been made righteous because Sovereign God decided to send his son in my place to pay for my mistakes.  He adores me even though he knows everything about me. The King of Kings, Creator of the Universe loves me and singled me out to be part of his family to inherit his Kingdom.  I am a friend of Jesus, a new creation, I am chosen, holy and blameless before Almighty God.  My body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, alive in Christ and the receiver of his promises.  I have been made complete in Christ.  I have peace and joy and my father God supplies all my needs.

If I fix my eyes on Jesus and focus in who I am in God, nothing can drag me down.  And anyway, if I’m fulfilling my calling, I’m pretty sure I can expect a few people not to be too happy!

Whilst this gives me loads of comfort when I could become despondent and downhearted, it also challenges me about the way I think of other people.  Do I love them regardless of their mistakes in the way Jesus loves me?  Despite attempts not to, do I hold their actions, or inaction, against them and let it affect my relationship with them?  Do I associate people with their actions or do I see them the way God does?

When I think about my children, I love them no matter how frustrating or naughty they can be.  But what about adults?  What about colleagues?  What about friends in the church?  My neighbours?  Other parents?

I know I’ve got a long way to go before I am truly loving others unconditionally, but I’m determined to keep going in that direction.  And that means forgiving when it’s not asked for, loving those who hurt me, offering second chances, and where I struggle to get past something, having the courage to tackle it with the individual concerned.  I’ll probably find it’s just a misunderstanding and even if we can’t resolve it, I find that airing the issue seems to unblock things anyway.

First written 23rd July 2011